Yeah I got potential. I put in a lot of effort to reach that potential.
Did the effort pay off? No.
Did it look like I didn’t do anything? Yes.
When I asked for help I was told “just do it.” So I kept trying really hard but still the results were far less than the effort put in. For some reason I burnt the hell out overextending myself to get stuff done.
I feel like the task is moving water from a pond to a large basin. Everyone else got buckets and I got a ladle.
Well, I’m trying, but my brain decided I should spend the next 3 hours doomscrolling while I mentally kick myself for not doing the thing already.
I think with adulthood there’s been more things I can “just do”, but the smaller things usually get procrastinated to hell and back for no reason besides “my brain didn’t want to do it”.
Same with potential, whatever greatness I was promised by everyone who said that hasn’t happened yet.
This was my life. I managed to get a masters degree and loved the process but everything else in life has been a constant struggle just to do basic things.
Yeah I got potential. I put in a lot of effort to reach that potential.
Did the effort pay off? No.
Did it look like I didn’t do anything? Yes.
When I asked for help I was told “just do it.” So I kept trying really hard but still the results were far less than the effort put in. For some reason I burnt the hell out overextending myself to get stuff done.
I feel like the task is moving water from a pond to a large basin. Everyone else got buckets and I got a ladle.
Well, I’m trying, but my brain decided I should spend the next 3 hours doomscrolling while I mentally kick myself for not doing the thing already.
I think with adulthood there’s been more things I can “just do”, but the smaller things usually get procrastinated to hell and back for no reason besides “my brain didn’t want to do it”.
Same with potential, whatever greatness I was promised by everyone who said that hasn’t happened yet.
This was my life. I managed to get a masters degree and loved the process but everything else in life has been a constant struggle just to do basic things.